Friday, July 23, 2010

The Crazies - Story #2

This episode of The Crazies is a little bit longer because this guy continued to send me messages. Here is his attempt to convince me he is not crazy. Fail.

Email Title: hello
Body: You were one of my quiver matches and i usually just glance at the little paragraph hit ignore and keep moving. for some reason i kept reading yours. i guess cause i saw you've been to n.o. and i wanted to see what you thought of it. but still i kept reading then i perused your pics and your eyes are amazing and your a very beautiful woman. I know you must hear that everyday from a million guys. i do think we have lots in common. i would love the opportunity to get to know you better. if anything at all a new chat buddy is great I'm really hoping to hear from you. but if not god bless and all my best wishes. personally i find it hard to see a pic and just start writing to it. i'm surprised i've written this much.
After this initial email, he repeatedly IMd me. Basically every.single.time I signed on. I never responded, which is why his persistence is somewhat remarkable.
Email title: hey dear
My greatest ally and my greatest enemy.... Honesty.... I know that I've visited your page a few times. I've seen that you've visited mines. I would love to chat with you I do think your extremely beautiful and eloquent. I don't have mesmerizing blue eyes like you or a that smile that rivals the sun in its warmth. I can definitely guarantee good conversations and my complete honesty. I really don't come on ok cupid that much. Every now and then I pop in to see if I've been lucky enough to receive a message but usually not and it's kinda depressing to not get any. So I try and stay away for as long as I can then I get bored or lonely and pop in again. your probably asking yourself why is he telling me this. Again that honesty thing gets me. My reasoning is that maybe if I give her my face book info she'll contact me?? I know I know wishful thinking. Anyways I'm sorry for bothering you. While I would love to hear from you I understand that I am just one of the millions contacting you. I wish you all the best in your search. God Bless...
After THIS message, he continued to "wink" at me and saved me as one of his favorites, and yes, still continued to IM me. To be honest, I feel kinda bad about it.....
Nevertheless, desperation is a cologne that doesn't smell good on anyone.


  1. "desperation is a cologne that doesn't smell good on anyone." ...Oh how right you are! Love his persistence long as it doesn't go full blown stalker you should be fine

  2. What's the part of these messages that makes this guy so crazy? His persistence? His apparent honesty? Bad grammar? His slight[internet-] social awkwardness?

    I've got a challenge for you: write the email/message that would get your attention (in a positive manner), regardless of what's in the fictional guy's profile. It's harder than it sounds, and it might bring you some sympathy.